***ANIMANIACS!***

Y/W/D: It's time for Animaniacs
        And we're zany to the max
        So just sit back and relax
        You'll laugh 'til you collapse
        We're Animaniacs!
 
Y&W: Come join the Warner Brothers
Dot: And the Warner Sister, Dot
Y/W/D: Just for fun we run around the Warner movie lot.
        They lock us in the tower whenever we get caught
        But we break loose and then vamoose
        And now you know the plot!
 
        We're Animaniacs!
        Dot is cute and Yakko yaks.
        Wakko packs away the snacks
        We pay tons of income tax.
        We're Animaniacs!
 
        Meet Ralph and Dr Scratchansniff; say hi to Hello Nurse.
        Goodfeathers flock together; Slappy whacks 'em with her purse.
        Buttons chases Mindy, while Rita sings a verse.
        The writers flipped; we have no script
        Why bother to rehearse?
 
Cast: We're Animaniacs!
        We have pay-or-play contracts.
        We're zany to the max
        There's baloney in our slacks.
        We're Animanie,
        Totally insaney
                         W:  Beast Wars-manie!    [Shot of Wakko in front of a huge set of shelves.  The shelves are covered with
                         every Transformer toy, video, comic, and other product ever produced.  One shelf
                         is dedicated entirely to the legendary/mythical/often-wished-for-but-entirely-
                         imaginary Skyfire, Nightbird, Elita-1, Unicron, Arcee, etc. toys.  Another shelf
                         prominently displays the books, special edition toys, etc. from Botcon 94, 95, and
                         96.  Beast Wars occupy their own shelf.  Wakko has all the Beast Wars toys -
                         EXCEPT - there is one conspicuous space in the midst of the Maximals which
                         contains a small sign reading "This space reserved for Cheetor".]
Cast: Animaniacs!
        Those are the facts.
 

[Following the Animaniacs theme, the episode title appears.]

               *** "Beast War-ners" ***

[Interior of the Water Tower.  Dot is reading while Yakko plays with his paddleball.  Wakko is laying on his
stomach in front of the TV, watching _Beast Wars_.]

Dr Scratchansniff: (Entering tower.) Good mornink, childrun, are ve ready to go for a drive?

Dot:  I guess.  (Walks over to door, still reading.)

Yakko:  As we'll ever be.  (Walks over to door, still bouncing his paddleball.)

[Wakko continues watching _Beast Wars_ intently without answering.]

Dr SNS:  Vakko, are ve ready to go?

[No answer.]

Dr SNS: (To D & Y.)  Is he vatching that zame show again?

D&Y: (In unison.)  Yes.

Dr SNS:  Vakko Varner, enough is enough.  Ve are goink now.

[Dr SNS walks over & hits the Eject button on the VCR.  There is the horrific sound of crinkling video tape;
the tape pops out, spilling a trail of unwound, tangled tape out behind it when SNS removes it from the VCR.]

W: (Wailing.)  My tape!!

Dr SNS: (Hurriedly, as Wakko produces his mallet.)  Now, Vakko, ve'll get you another vun.

W:  "The Web" might not be on again for weeks! (Advances menacingly on Dr SNS, mallet held over his head
in striking position.)

Y: (Intervening.) Aaaah, hang on, bro.  Scratchy'll get you that figure you're still missing instead.

[Wakko lowers his mallet.]

Dr SNS:  I vill?

[Wakko lifts his mallet again.]

Dr SNS: (Hurriedly.)  Oh, yes, I vill, of course.

W: (Racing out the door.)  Last one in the car's a Baloney fan!
Y&D: (Racing after him, yelling.)  Noooooo!!

**Commercial Break**

Dr SNS:  Ve've checked every toy store in ze city.  It is almost two o'clock.  Ve are not goink to vind zat Beast
tingie you vanted, Vakko, and ve are not goink to vaste any more time lookink for a toy. (Pause.)  Besides,
aren't youse kids gettink a little old for dose tinks?

Y/W/D: (Loudly, in unison.)  NO.

Dr SNS:  Ah.  Vell.  Ve vill talk about dat at Wednesday's session.

[Yakko grabs his throat with both hands in the universal sign for choking.  Dot opens her mouth and points a
finger down her throat.  Wakko doesn't respond.  Y&D exchange worried looks, but quickly resume straight
faces and look attentive as Dr SNS glances at them in the rearview mirror.  W looks depressed and sulky.  A
black cloud is (literally) hanging over his head.]

Dr SNS:  Now, vhy don't ve go to ze zoo for ze rest of ze day?

[Y&D give their depressed brother a quick look, then go into a huddle.  Lots of unintelligible whispering
ensues.]

Y: (Breaking from the huddle.)  Aaaah, Scratchy, I've got a better idea.  Why don't you take us to visit the
Paramount lot like you've been promising?

Dr SNS: (Looking confused.)  Like I've been promisink?  I didn't promise to take youse kids to visit Paramount. 
(Pause.) Did I?

D: (Fingers crossed behind her back.)  Sure you did, Scratchy.

Dr SNS:  I did? (Under his breath.)  Vat vas I tinkink to promise zese nuts a trip to Paramount?  I must have
been drinkink or sometink.  (More loudly.)  Oh vell, I guess today's as good a time as any.

**Commercial Break**

[The Warner C.E.O.'s office.  The Water Tower is visible through the window behind the desk.  There are four
baskets on his desk.  Plotz is sitting at his desk, doing paperwork.  One is marked "In" and one is marked "out". 
Both contain small piles of paper.  The other two baskets are labelled "Complaints about Warners" and "Bills
for Warner-caused Damages".  Their contents are piled to the ceiling.  The intercom buzzes.]

Plotz: (Pressing button on intercom.)  Yes?

Secretary: (Sounding very harried.)  Paramount Studios on Line 3, sir.  It's urgent.

P: (To intercom.)  Thank you.  Put them through.  (Releases intercom button.)

[Phone rings & Plotz picks it up.]

P: (To phone.)  Thaddeus Plotz speaking.  

[Listens.  Excited babbling issues from the phone, only the repeated word "Warners" is intelligible.  Plotz holds
the phone further and further away from his ear as the voice gets louder and louder.]

P:  You're not making any sense.  Could you please repeat that?

[More babble from the phone, "Dr Scratchansniff" and "Warners" are heard several times.]

P:  Put Dr Scratchansniff on please.  Maybe he'll make a little more sense! 

[Pause.]

P: (Calmly.)  All right, Dr Scratchansniff.  From the beginning, please.  (Listens.)  You took the Warners to tour
Paramount's lot.  (Listens.)  (Less calmly)  You visited the "Voyager" set.  (Listens.)  (Gives phone a suspicious
look, sticks finger in ear to clean out ear.)  I must have heard you incorrectly.  I thought you said that the
Warners jumped on the set's transporter pads, disappeared, then reappeared inside the monitor on the filmed
"Voyager"'s transporter pads.  They proceeded to completely ruin the filmed episode which had just completed
production.

[More excited babbling from phone.]

P: (Face-faults.)  That IS what you said?  But...but...that's impos...  (Split second pause as he spins his chair
around to face  the Water Tower.)  What am I saying?  This is the *WARNERS* we're talking about. 
*NOTHING* is impossible.

[Fade out, then fade into next scene.]

[Interior of "Voyager".  Yakko, Wakko, and Dot are busy locking the confused crew in the holodeck.]

D:  Sorry 'bout this.  We'll let you have your ship back just as soon as we take care of a quick little visit.

[Rita & Runt run through.]

Runt:  That was definitely a nice alien, Rita.  He wants us to come back for dinner.  Definitely a nice alien. 
Definitely.

Rita:  Runt, sometimes I wonder how you ever survived long enough to meet me.

Neelix: (Faintly, from offscreen)  Here kitty, kitty!

Rita:  Uh oh.  Time to move on!  Let's go, Runt!

Runt:  Sure, Rita.  Where're we goin'?

[Rita & Runt run offscreen.  Neelix, wearing his chef's outfit, runs through in pursuit.]

Neelix:  Here kitty, kitty!  Nice doggy!  Come help Neelix fix dinner!

[Neelix runs offscreen.]

Janeway: (Looking rather green.) (To Dot.)  No rush.  Feel free to leave us here till at _least_ after dinner.

Rest of "Voyager"'s crew: (Together)  Please!!

**Commercial Break**

[Animation note:  Unless otherwise noted, all _Beast Wars_ scenes & characters are in CGI while all
_Animaniacs_ scenes & characters are in traditional animation.]

[Beast Wars planet.  The subtitle "Elsewhere in the space-time-reality continuum..." appears across the bottom
of the screen momentarily.  A lifepod is sitting in a small forest clearing.  Tigatron & Airazor race & dive into
the clearing at the same time as Blackarachnia & Inferno arrive by ground & air respectively.  Transformations
& a firefight occur immediately.]

[Elsewhere in the forest.  A giant chicken (in traditional animation) tilts his head sideways & clucks
disapprovingly at the battlenoises behind him, then struts off into the forest.  Iris out on the chicken
disappearing into the forest.]

["Voyager"'s bridge.  Dot is in the captain's chair.  Yakko is in Paris's seat and Wakko is busily bouncing
between all the remaining stations.  All three Warners are dressed in Star Fleet uniform.]

Y:  Course, captain?

D:  Second wormhole to the right and straight on till morning - or till the end of the next commercial break. 
(Pause.)  Oh - and keep it under Warp 10, Lieutenant Yakko.  I'm too cute to wear scales.

[Fade to black.  Iris in on giant chicken approaching the Predacon base.]

Scorponok: (On guard duty outside the entrance.)  (Over comlink.)  Megatron, there is some kind of very large
bird approaching the base.

[Inside base.]

Megatron:  Ah, that must be the new Predacon, yesss.

[Moves to monitor, sees chicken and checks energy readouts.  Scowls & thwacks monitor quite hard with one
hand.]

Meg:  Scorponok!  The computer is malfunctioning again.  It does not recognize the energy signature of the
new Predacon.  (Whacks computer console again, monitor goes staticky & console shoots sparks, then monitor
blanks out.)  Now it is not functioning at all!  Get down here and fix it at once!  Scorponok!!

[Outside base.]

Scorp:  (Claws chattering nervously as he climbs ramp to base entrance.)  Yes Megatron, right away Megatron.

[Chicken reaches end of ship's ramp just as Megatron emerges from base.  Tarantulas & Waspinator accompany
Megatron.]

Meg:  (To Chicken Boo.)  You are the new Predacon, yesss?

Tarantulas:  (Twitching his mandibles.)  Predacon?  This mangy fowl a Predacon?  It looks more like a giant
chicken to me.

Meg:  Nooo, do not be absurd.  Of course he is not a chicken, nooo.  He is a Predacon, yesss?

Chicken Boo:  (Blinks slowly.)  Cluck.

Meg:  (Nodding.)  Yesss, of course you are a Predacon.  I am Megatron, your leader.  And you are?

CB:  Cluck, cluck-bock!

Meg:  Ah yes, Boo-a-tron.  Welcome to the Predacon ranks.

Tar:  (To Waspinator.)  I am telling you, he is a giant chicken.

Meg:  (Sharply.)  Tarantulas!  That is not an appropriate way to speak of your new comrade, nooo.  I do not
wish to hear any further mention of the word "chicken".  Nooo, that word I do not wish to hear again.  (Turning
to re-enter ship.)  Now, let us prepare for the attack that will put an end to those Maximal nuisances once and
for all.  We shall destroy them, yesss!

**Commercial Break**

[Inside "Voyager".  Dot is in the captain's chair, Yakko at navigation, and Wakko at engineering.]

D:  (Pointing at viewscreen.)  What are we doing *here*?!  (Camera switches to viewscreen.  DS9 is visible
onscreen.)  And just how did we get here so fast?  I thought it was supposed to take decades for "Voyager" to
get back here?

W:  Oh, I just hooked the warp engine into an Acme "Mr. Fusion" industrial model, dumped in a bunch of
funny-looking stuff from the ship's kitchen, then applied the Laws of Cartoon Physics, cross-referenced to the
Laws of Anime Physics, and - VOILA!

D:  Mm-hm.  In other words, you applied techno-babble & cheated.

W:  In true Star Trek and anime tradition.

D:  Oookay.  But you still haven't answered my first question.

["Voyager" is hailed by the station.  Kira & Dax appear on-screen.]

Y&W:  (In unison.)  Hell-lo, alien nurses!

D:  Never mind.

[Fade to black.]

*    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *

[Middle of large plain where Waspinator & Cheetor fought for the first time in Part 1 of the pilot.  Even the
same tree is there.  The Maximals (Optimus Primal, Rattrap, Dinobot, Rhinox, and Cheetor) & Predacons
(Megatron, Tarantulas, Waspinator, Terrorsaur, Scorponok, and Chicken Boo) are facing off.  All are still in
beast mode.]

Meg:  Surrender, Optimus Primal!  The Maximals shall never prevail!  No, you shall be destroyed!

Primal:  The Maximals will never surrender to the Predacons, Megatron!

[Flavio & Marita stroll through, picnic basket in hand.]

Flavio:  Marita, my darling, it would appear that our planned picnic location has already been claimed by a
rather rowdy lot of ruffians.  Perhaps we should try that quaint stone circle after all?

Marita:  Yes, my dearest Flavio.  I could not possibly enjoy my lunch in the presence of such uncouth
barbarians.

Flavio:  Come then, sweetums.  We shall attempt to find a more congenial locale in which to dine.

[Flavio & Marita stroll off, arm in arm.]

[Window opens in tree trunk & Slappy Squirrel pokes her upper body out.]

Slappy:  Alright, who's makin' all the racket?  Pipe down, would ya?!

[Waspinator is hovering in beast mode beside the tree.]

Slappy:  Durn bugs get bigger all the time.

[Slappy whacks Waspinator over the head with her purse.  He crashes to the ground & lays there for a minute. 
Stars & birds circle his head.  The birds are the Goodfeathers.]

Squit:  Whatta cameo, circlin' this guy's head till he gets up.

Pesto:  Whatta ya mean by that?  Circlin'?  You sayin' I'm some kinda carousel horse goin' around in circles for
your amusement?

Squit:  No, I'm just sayin' we're circlin' this guy's head till he gets his wits back, that's all.

Pesto:  Oh, so you're sayin' I'm some baby's crib mobile circlin' around t'improve his focus, is that what you're
sayin'?

Squit:  No, Pesto, I'm just sayin'...

Pesto:  That's it!

[Pesto attacks Squit and the two pigeons disappear in a whirling ball of feathers.]

Bobby:  (Still circling.)  Ah, Pesto, knock it off.  Squit didn't mean noth - aak!

[Pesto reaches out of the fight long enough to yank Bobby in.  All three Goodfeathers land on top of
Waspinator, who gets sucked into the fight as well.  The tumbling ball of fighting pigeons & hapless Predacon
rolls offscreen.]

[A door opens in the tree trunk & Slappy & Skippy emerge.]

Slappy:  Move to another planet and ya _still_ can't find a quiet neighbourhood.  (Yelling.)  Everybody shut up
'n' clear outta my backyard!!  Yer interruptin' ma teevee viewin'!!

[Scorponok fires a missile straight at Slappy.  The explosion hides Slappy & Skippy from view.]

Slappy:  (Appearing behind Scorp.)  Ya call that an explosion!  (Spits.)  Ptui!  (Pulls a VERY Big Bomb from
behind her back.)  Now, THIS is an explosion!

[Slappy lobs the V.B.B. at Scorp.  The *HUGE* explosion throws Scorp up in the air, out of the planetary
atmosphere, past the orbiting stasis pods & moons.  He comes hurtling back down just as Mindy runs through,
chased by Buttons.  Buttons freezes & looks up as the shadow of the falling Scorp spreads around him.  Scorp
crashes down on top of him.  In true 'toon fashion, the ground doesn't stop Scorp's fall.  He crashes through the
ground & disappears from sight, taking Buttons with him.]

Skippy:  Whoa.  Like, _way_ cool, Aunt Slappy.  Can I try?

Slappy:  Sure, kid.  Have a blast.

[Slappy pulls another V.B.B. from behind her back & hands it to Skippy, just as Scorp's arms reach out of the
hole.  Skippy lobs it at the robot crawling out of the hole, and the same explosion routine happens again.]

Skippy:  (As Scorp sails down to crash into Buttons who's trying to crawl out of the hole)  How's that, Aunt
Slappy?

Slappy:  Not bad, kid.  But like I keep tellin' ya, it's all in the wrist.  Watch 'n' learn.  (Slappy lobs another
V.B.B. at the re-emerging Scorp.)  See what I mean?

Skippy:  (As Scorp sails up out of the atmosphere again)  Yeah, I think so.

Slappy:  Here, give it another shot.  (Hands another V.B.B. to Skippy.)

**Commercial Break**

["Voyager"'s bridge.  Dot, Yakko, & Wakko enter.]

Dot:  Wakko, I can't believe you traded two Giant Mallets, two Giant Anvils, an Instant Hole, and a spare
Wacky Sack for two lousy toys.

Y:  Boy, that Ferengi sure spotted a sucker when you walked in.

W:  Hey, it was worth every item!  I'll own the only autographed Mint In Package G1 & G2 Swindle toys in our
universe in the twentieth century!

D:  (Suspicious.)  That was quite the coincidence, us just HAPPENING to visit DS9 at the same time and in the
same universe as a certain transforming jeep.

W:  (Innocently.)  Yes it was, wasn't it.

Y&D:  (Together.)  Shee-yah, rrr-ight.

*    *         *    *    *    *    *    *

[Battlefield on plains.]

Meg:  Waspinator!  Scorponok!  Nooo, this simply is not acceptable!  Stop playing games and attack the
Maximals!  Yesss, join the attack!

[Waspinator makes it halfway out of the whirling ball of fighting Goodfeathers before being yanked back in by
Pesto.]

Pesto:  Pastafazool!  Fettucine alfredo!  Circlin'?  I'll give you circlin'!

[Scorponok actually makes it about two steps away from the hole.]

Slappy:  No, no, Skippy, you need a little more lift on the throw.  Here, I can see this is gonna take a while. 
(Dumps about 100 Very Big Bombs in a pile beside Skippy.)  Now, pay attention this time!

[Slappy lobs another V.B.B., there is a tremendous BOOM! and Scorp goes sailing up through the air again.]

Meg:  (Turning to Chicken Boo)  We cannot rely on them.  Nooo, we must handle this ourselves.  Boo-a-tron,
terrorize and attack!!

[Expectant pause.  Chicken Boo blinks.]

Rattrap:  (To Dinobot.)  That guy's just a great big chicken.

Dinobot:  It would be foolish to underestimate the new Predacon's courage.

Rattrap:  No, I mean, he really is a giant chicken.

Dinobot: (Hissing.)  Rattrap...

Rattrap:  Look, Chopper-face, just watch!

Meg:  (Impatient.)  Did you not hear me, Boo-a-tron?  Attack!

[Chicken Boo clucks nervously & blinks.]

Megs:  Boo-a-tron, terrorize!

[Chicken Book clucks some more & blinks again.]

Tarantulas:  See, I told you!  He's a giant chicken!

Meg:  A giant chicken, yesss!  He is indeed a giant chicken!

[Meg advances on Chicken Boo.  His jaws snap shut & catch a single tailfeather as Boo flies away in a panic.]

Rattrap:  (To Dinobot.)  Told you so.

Meg:  This must have been a Maximal trick.  Yesss.  The Maximals attempted to trick us.  But it shall avail
them naught.  Nooo.  Predacons, destroy them!  

[Before anyone has a chance to do anything, the air shimmers &, in familiar Star Trek fashion, three figures
appear.]

Wakko:  We're late - see, the fight's already starting.

Dot:  *I* wanted to ask directions from the last spaceship we passed, but _no_.  You boys just wouldn't admit
we were lost.  So if we're late, it's all *YOUR* fault.

Yakko:  Hey, the navigator's never lost.  We just - aah - wanted to take the scenic route - right, Wakko?

W:  Yeah, the scenic route.

D:  (To camera.)  Boys.  Go fig.

Meg:  (To Y/W/D.)  Intruders, explain your presence here at once or prepare to be destroyed.  Yesss, we will
destroy you if you do not explain your presence here.

Y&W:  We're the Warner brothers.

D:  And the Warner sister.

Y:  We're just tourists.  So you just go right ahead & do whatever you were about to do when we teleported in.

[While Yakko is speaking, Wakko is busy pulling things out of his Wacky Sack.  First, he pulls out a collapsible
grandstand, then hands out hats sporting the Maximal symbol to Y&D & dons one himself.  He hands out "Go,
Maximals!" pennants to Y&D, then pulls out a "We luv you, Cheetor" sign for himself before whipping out a
camera and starting to take pictures.]

Meg:  You cannot merely observe.  Nooo, if you are not here to join the Predacons, then you must be destroyed. 
Yesss.  Predacons, terrorize!

Y:  Well, if that's the way you're going to be...

**Commercial Break**

Y:  Warner sibs, Warnerize!

[The Warners all change to CGI graphics and change to beast forms of equal size to the Maxs & Preds.  Yakko
becomes a blue blowfish, Wakko a red anteater, and Dot a yellow platypus (their animals from "Super Strong
Warner Siblings").]

Tarantulas:  Tarantulas, terrorize! (Transforms to robot mode.)

Y:  Yakko, Warnerize!  (Transforms to robot form that has his own features but retains the blue colour.  He
holds a giant paddle-ball toy in one hand and begins to bounce it menacingly.)

Terrorsaur:  Terrorsaur, terrorize!

D:  Princess Angelina Contessa -

Meg:  An excessively long name, yesss.

Y&W:  (Loudly.)  Shh!  It's not your turn yet!

D: - Louisa Francesca Banana Fana Bo Besca -

Meg:  Are you not finished yet?

Y&W:  (In unison.)  I really wouldn't keep interrupting if I were you, nooo!

D: (gives Meg a dirty look)  - The Third, Warnerize!  (Transforms to yellow Dot-robot.)

[Maximals are all staring in disbelief.]

Rattrap:  Well, fer bootin' up cold..

Primal:  Now that's just *prime*.

Cheetor:  Whoa, outta sight...

Meg:  It's about time, yesss, it certainly is!

D:  (Ignoring Terrorsaur.)  (To Meg, very sweetly & looking very cute.)  Didn't anyone ever tell you that it isn't
polite to interrupt?

Y&W:  (To Meg)  Don't try to say we didn't warn you!

D:  (Striking a pose.)  In the name of the moon, I will...

W:  (Timidly.)  Uh, sis?  Wrong show.

D:  (V. upset, stamps her foot.)  Aargh!  And this is for ruining my concentration!!

[Dot taps the Star Fleet insignia still on her shoulder & the familiar chirp is heard.]

D:  (To combadge.)  Computer, initiate transporter program B&K One.

Y&W:  (Horrified.)  No - not -

[The familiar Star Trek transporter effect appears.  Within, a large, orange shape is vaguely visible.]

**Commercial Break**

Y&W:  - the orange lumpy thing!

[The transporter effect disappears as Y&W speak, leaving Baloney clearly visible.]

Baloney:  Gosh golly-ookums, good afternoon, everyone!  And how are all my very special friends today?

Rattrap:  (Fatalistically.)  We're all gonna die.

Cheetor:  (Horrified.)  What *IS* that thing?

Primal:  Now *that's* _JUST PRIME_.

Rhinox:  I don't like the looks of this...  (Maximizes & whips out the chaingun o' doom.)

Meg:  You expect to frighten me with that sorry excuse for a dinosaur?  Nooo, such pitiful tactics shall avail
you naught.  Megatron, terrorize!

[Meg transforms and blasts Baloney with his head cannon.  A huge explosion obscures Baloney from view.]

Baloney:  Aw, somebody's feeling a little cranky today, is he?  Well, we can fix that, can't we kiddies?  Let's all
hug & sing our gosh-golly-fun friendship song!

[Baloney bounds over to Meg, merrily skipping unharmed through repeated shots from Meg's head cannon.]

Baloney:  (Throwing his arms around Meg's waist and hugging him.  The sound of metal buckling & cracking
under the strain can be heard.)  (Sings.)  I love you, you love...

Terrorsaur:  Megatron has been captured!  I, Terrorsaur, -

W:  Wakko, Warnerize! (Transforms to red Wakko-robot, complete with Giant Mallet.)

Terror:  - lead the Pred-urk!  (Terrorsaur is flattened, Wile E. Coyote accordion-style, by Wakko's Giant
Mallet.)

Tar:  Tarantulas, beast-mode!  (Begins a hasty retreat.)

Y:  (To camera.)  Hey kids!  Playing with giant bugs isn't cool.  If someone wants you to play with a giant bug,
just say "no thanks".  That's cool.  Hei!  (Bounces paddleball off Tar rapidly & repeatedly, only stopping when
Tar looks like your typical "swatted with the heel of a shoe" spider.)

Baloney:  (Still hugging Meg, who now has the squished-in waist proportions of a Barbie doll, & singing.)  *I*
is for Imagine...

Y:  (Wipes off paddleball with giant handkerchief.)  Ooo, ick.  (Holds hanky away from himself, gingerly
gripped between two fingers.) Yakko, 'toon mode.  (Changes from CGI Yakko-robot to usual animated Yakko. 
The paddleball & dirty hanky disappear.)  (Drawls to W&D.)  Well, pardners, guess our job here is done.  Time
to beam on up and warp on out.

D:  Dot, 'toon mode.  (Changes to usual cute self, wearing Star Trek uniform again.)  Great, I REALLY want to
get home and *EAT* - I refuse to eat anything out of the ship's kitchen.  Shall I have us beamed up?

Y:  Wakko?  Ready to go?

Primal:  Excuse me, but you're not going to leave him like that, are you?  (Points to Meg, still being hugged.)

Rattrap:  (Watching Baloney in fascinated horror.)  Eh, why not?

Baloney:  (Still singing.)  ...and *E* is for Egad, I said Imagine twice!

Rattrap:  (Wincing and raising his hands to his audio sensors.)  Err, forget I asked.

Dinobot:  Being hugged to death by an orange lumpy thing that sings terrible lyrics off-key is no fitting death
for a warrior!

Rhinox: (Agreeing.)  Even a Predacon doesn't deserve such a horrible end.

D:  (Sighing.)  Oh, alright.  (Taps combadge.)  Computer, reverse transporter program B&K One.  (Baloney
disappears in a transporter beam.  Dot snaps her fingers.  A Very Large Anvil drops on Meg before he can
stagger away.)  There, are you happy now?

Primal:  (Backing away cautiously.)  Yes, that will be fine.  Maximals, back to the base!

W:  (In 'toon mode, busily snapping pictures as the Maximals retreat.)  Okay, I'm ready to go now.

D:  Finally!  (Taps combadge.)  Computer, three to beam up.

**Commercial Break**

[Inside Maximal base.]

Primal:  (Looking around.)  Has anyone seen Cheetor lately?

*    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *

[Inside the water tower.  The TV turns itself on and "Voyager" appears onscreen.  Y/W/D transport into their
living quarters.]

D:  Home sweet home!

Y:  Wakko, why is your Wacky Sack bulging so much?

[Exterior of water tower.]

W:  Oh, that's just because it's kind of full.  See?

D:  Oh no.  Don't tell me...

Y:  Please tell me you didn't...

Cheetor:  Lemme outta here!  Op-ti-mus!  Rat-trap!  AN-Y-BOD-Y!!  HELP!!

Y/D:  He did.  WAKKO!!


*******************************************************************************

This fanfic is admittedly a bit loaded with crossovers, so if you're unfamiliar with either _Animaniacs_
(particularly "Baloney & Kids", "The Please Please Pleese Get a Life Foundation", and "Super Strong Warner
Siblings") or _Transformers: Beast Wars_, then you probably didn't "get" this at all.  And if you're unfamiliar
with Lizard's TF/DS9 fanfic "Sale of the Twenty-fifth Century" (plug, plug) and Star Trek (particularly _Star
Trek:  Voyager_), then you probably missed a few things too.  Oh well.

All the usual disclaimers apply:
The Animaniacs characters and names are trademarked and copyrighted by Warner Bros., Inc.  The
Transformers characters and names are trademarked and copyrighted by Hasbro and Marvel.  Star Trek
characters and names are trademarked and copyrighted by Paramount.  This story is fan-fiction and may not be
reproduced, in whole or in part, without the express permission of the author.  An unaltered copy (and I do
mean _UNALTERED_!) may be kept in personal archives.  If you want to place it on a web or ftp site, please
contact me for permission first.  This story is distributed free of charge and MAY NOT be placed anywhere
where its distribution will involve a charge.

E-mail me comments (no flames, please!  I'll just ignore them) at:
az529@freenet.carleton.ca     OR    dcalder@mnsi.net

Diana Calder
January 1997